The day I was reminded

Odveci článok, ale  myšlienky, ktoré som potrebovala dostať na papier, lebo som proste potrebovala. Plus musím sa donútiť písať po anglicky!!!

Sometimes you forget. You do something you love and you do it again and again and again. And one day you realise it has become a stereotype. And you feel like you have to do it. You don't remember why, you just do it, because it's Wednesday and on Wednesdays you dance. Why? Because it is Wednesday and that is when you dance. So you dance, not because you want to, but because it's fucking Wednesday. And soon you realise you actually hate Wednesdays, because you have to go and dance. You write, because it's been too long since you last published something, therefore you have to publish something again, and it all suddenly becomes your responsibility, and not what you love to do. You draw and wonder why don't people just take photos of things they see instead of drawing which is imperfect and takes way longer. So you do all you used to love just because it's become a stereotype and you have to.

And the most beautiful days in life? They are those when you are unexpectedly reminded, and your eyes are suddenly wide open, and the world's full of sense for a chance and time. Those days are so rare, yet perfect. That is how I would describe my Saturday. Because of an injury I wasn't able to compete in My Dance competition last week-end, I've decided not to for my leg is still quite unsteady and starts to hurt sometimes. I can't do all I used to be able to and I'd never forgive myself if I competed and something went wrong because it's never just the one person who loses, it's whole group and I could never do that to them, we've worked too hard. However, I decided to go and support my friends, decision that made me doubtful for quite a long time. What was I to do there, wouldn't I be there unwanted? I wasn't sure whether I wanted to go even the morning when I was already sitting in the bus. A friend I was sitting next to asked me why I went, that she wouldn't want to, which didn't make me feel any better nor more invited. The person I used to sit next to and talk to the most in the dance group left last year to go to school in other city and since then I've felt a bit lost, for everyone has people they've known for ages there, they're even classmates, and those spend time together, and I often feel like I am the one they don't need nor want.

That day ended up as one of the best in my life. I enjoyed being able to do whatever I wanted, went wherever I wanted whenever I wanted, not having to do my make up nor anything. I had coffee (which was't all that good) with girls, I and a girl I've never got a chance to get to know spent  majority of the day together, we laughed our heads off when running to Billa that was about to close in less then ten minutes, we enjoyed our secret midnight beer we bought. There were other people I've barely exchanged a few polite words with before and that night we talked about our future and dreams and things I wouldn't tell many people. We won nothing that night (though we(they) did their best and the performance was awesome) due to not the best nor fairest of referees who (how could that happen?) let win the host school most of the prizes and didn't even bother looking at other competitors. Seriously, they just talked or doodled into their notes. No one cared. After hearing the results, many of us laughed so hard they had tears in their eyes. That was the last time we competed in My Dance... yet the best day in a long time, one that reminded me why I love those girls and why we dance together.
We were born to be REBELS.